marriage

God says in Genesis 2:20-22 (NIV)

("But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called 'woman,'
for she was taken out of man."

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.")

There is man out there that God designed me for. He's going through something right now and that's a deep sleep. He's asleep from seeing the works the Lord is doing in him at the moment and while this man is sleeping, God is forming me into his likeness. Spiritually, we are being created. Right now I am content with Jesus Christ being the love of my life, but one day, God will present me to this man.

My life of Worship.

Yesterday around 1:07pm, I realized how I want to go out from this world...

I want to enter God's Kingdom by using my last earthly breath worshiping Jesus with whatever I do best.

After joining United Student Ministries...I noticed my peers praised in their own unique ways. Some by prayer, playing music, singing, etc...Soon enough, I learned how to individually open up to God in another spectacular way. I praised God by dancing. At first I was so scared. I was scared to move and be moved, but soon enough, I stopped caring about everything that was making me afraid and just focused on my personal and deepest reverance and thankfulness towards Jesus. I constantly have to remind myself it doesn't matter what I look like when I'm in the presence of El Shaddai. *At the end of it all, did you become empowered, encouraged, and aware of things about yourself, others and God? When you stop at nothing to encouter Him, he will never leave you empty handed and without a purpose.

So when I worship, I truly put my trust in him as I close my eyes and move in his thrown room. I'm entirely his as I express my deepest form of love and gratitude towards the King of all kings. Dancing is what I know best, so why not offer him my best? He entrusted me with such a gift and I give him my craft of dance with excellence and growth. Through struggles, pain, heartache, confusion, fear...doesn't matter, I celebrate before my God and I rejoice in his joyful love and compassion for me. I walk in His thrown blessing his very name with ALL of my emotions and fears, then leaving with still and calm waters inside me. It doesn't matter what I'm feeling, He cares--God is very personal, but he still deserves a radical and honest praise of trust and worship.

Worship isnt just a personal praise, but a partnership with the Holy Spirit to celebrate and work with you. So whatever you do best...offer it to God. He wants us to trust him, so trust him with the gifts that HE HAS GIVEN YOU, it's never the other way around. I hope you discover the great talent(s) that Jesus left you with and partner up with his Holy Spirit. I love you all, God bless.

:)

Matthew 25:14-30

<3

I heard this song while driving around with my older brother...He likes country music so he plays it.

WOW let me tell you, at first I was just like, "eh, I'll listen.." but when this song came up on the CD player--I received it more than I ever thought I could.

So, my mom isn't really a Christian. She goes to church, but her personal relationship with God is still growing. I've never been a mother but I'm pretty sure it's hard to let go of your children.

In John 19:25-27, Jesus gave away his mother because he knew he belonged to God and needed to be with Him...his flesh was hers for a moment, but he was always God's to begin with.

My mom has such a hard time accepting and understanding my faith because she hasn't fully accepted it for herself. But I know that'll change soon. I still love her, I still respect her--but I know who I belong to and sometimes, I wish I could share this love with her...I just need her to be strong and let go of everything that's hurt her previously. If Jesus could save Paul...then truly, nothing is impossible for Him. My plea is for you to not be offended by Jesus anymore. People have hurt you because you placed them in God's place. You see...Jesus doesn't let a certain love enter you unless it comes from Him--and we all search for that, but when we let other people TRY to give us that, they let us down because they can't...so when something tragic and hurtful happens to us, we blame God for that hurt people caused us...I pray you don't do that anymore, because life was never supposed to be lived with that kind of pain. Please give your heart back to Jesus, the one who will restore your pain with joy and completeness.

this week's theme:

"Stress is an ignorant state, it believes everything is an emergency."
"Little things affect little minds" --Rev Run

If you fall under pressure, your strength is too small. (Proverbs 24:10)

wisdom.

I never understood this until now...

"to live is Christ and to die is gain." (Philippians 1:21)<3

a better road.

Everyday since I've stopped writing, I've had something good to say...but never wrote it down. It is very difficult taking the time to reflect and write down memories and I truly regret being lazy.

Right now, I'm in a state where I need God to give me an extra push...I feel Him directing me into something amazing, but I can't explain where and exactly how to get there.

go and sin no more

So in John Chapter 8, we can all read about the woman who got caught in adultery...

Before I explain, go ahead and click the link to read (JOHN 8:1-11)


*pretty crazy stuff huh?*

Think about something you did in the past that you just KNEW was wrong..but you did it anyway--then you got caught. Now notice that in the midst of all the chaos...the woman never speaks out to defend herself because she knows she is guilty. However, Jesus did--He spoke out in her defense and demonstrated no condemnation with compassion and wisdom. So the woman didn't get stoned to death by her accusers nor did God strike her down, but Jesus gave her a second chance.

Let Jesus fight your battles, but let go of whatever makes you sin "or something even worse may happen to you." (John 5:14)

Imagine, you already received a second chance...Your finish line awaits, but when you get there...is it the right one you want to cross over to? Its your choice, you're the one who's running towards it.

-andre jordan.

Its so annoying when I come across really shallow people. Impressing others with temporary things will get you temporary friends.

"A life devoted to things is a dead life." Proverbs 11:28 (NLT)

Overcome.

Lately, I've been thinking about my past...and realized there are some pictures/videos roaming around this vast internet that proves what a wreck i was. I was constantly hurting...and i remember feeling that.

I really wanted to hide my past from my church and from myself...but I really can't. It's what brought me here...although its something I sometimes feel ashamed about, I also feel overwhelmingly thankful. My debt was plenty, yet Christ paid for me and restored me...in full. Truly, I don't know how to express how thankful I am to Jesus...but I know God can hear my gratitude and soon, I'd like to share my testimony. <3

Luke 7:41-43

Jesus told him, "Two people were in debt to a moneylender. One of them owed him five hundred silver coins, and the other owed him fifty. Since neither of them could pay him back, the moneylender said that they didn't have to pay him anything. Which one of them will like him more?"

Simon answered, "I suppose it would be the one who had owed more and didn't have to pay it back."

"You are right," Jesus said.

I AM FEARLESS!

Psalm 23 (NIV)

A psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I WILL FEAR NO EVIL,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

reoccuring theme this week.

Jesus never said life is going to be easy...matter of fact, in John 16:33 He warns us of hard times, failures, and mishaps...

"I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”

So be courageous!

"With all this going for us, my dear, dear friends, stand your ground. And don't hold back. Throw yourselves into the work of the Master, confident that nothing you do for him is a waste of time or effort."
1 Corinthians 15:58 (the message)

John 8:12

This reminded me of Michelangelo's "Birth of Adam"

Not only did it leave me speechless, it gave me a sense of comfort knowing that God will always be our light, connected by Jesus Christ.


photo taken from my iphone.

"When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." (John 8:12) NIV

As much as it hurts...

"Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces." Matthew 7:6 (NIV)

We can't force others to know God.

a love only God can give.

For a while now, I've been feeling an overwhelming emotion of loneliness during the past days and nights--so much that my heart was physically feeling a pull...it was like I strained a muscle. I do believe God doesn't give you a message without testing you on it first. Basically, you accepted truth because you've experienced it.

So the whole time I was going through that overwhelming emotion, God was telling me to "be still and know that I am God." (Psalm 46:10)

I can't rush this process but in the meantime I can live a life of patience and contentment. Also, in those hurting moments where I have no one in my life...is the time when Jesus REALLY wants me to get to know and grow closer to Him.

2 Corinthians 6:3-8, 10 (NIV)

Paul's Hardships

³We put no stumbling block in anyone's path, so that our ministry will not be discredited. ⁴Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; ⁵in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; ⁶in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; ⁷in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; ⁸through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors;

¹⁰sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything.

Deuteronomy 30:11 (The Message)

This commandment that I'm commanding you today isn't too much for you, it's not out of your reach. It's not on a high mountain—you don't have to get mountaineers to climb the peak and bring it down to your level and explain it before you can live it. And it's not across the ocean—you don't have to send sailors out to get it, bring it back, and then explain it before you can live it. No. The word is right here and now—as near as the tongue in your mouth, as near as the heart in your chest. Just do it!

*I found this drawing while I was walking around Mountain View Christian School of Las Vegas. Unfortunately, I don't know the name of the artist behind this amazing drawing.*

Yesterday was my first day as a youth leader at the Champion Center for United Student Ministries. I ask God that he blesses our team and allow us to be one in mind and spirit. Praying with integrity and honesty. I already love all the kids and youths that go there on Tuesday. My heart goes out to all of them and I want us to grow strong and maturely through God's will and divine grace.

Holy Spirit, have your way through us young and old at United and the Champion Center. Make this generation of godly men and women be bold and unafraid to change the city of Las Vegas and this Nation with our good deeds inspired and fueled by our love for Jesus Christ. Amen.

"We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God." -2 Corinthians 5:20 (NIV)

I need integrity.

to be the same person before God and men.
On another note, i've never had a favorite flower before...

The thought was inspired by Vincent Van Gogh's "Blossoming almond tree." I love how it was a present for his brother and sister-in-law's new born baby.



A person asked me to close my eyes and think of an image that represents life.
The first thing I saw was a beautiful bright magenta flower in total bloom.

*picture your life image. close your eyes and see.
this may represent everything you are. your personality, how you handle situations, where God is in your life, & how you let him conduct his works with you.

dont think about it too much, just the first thing you see when you close your eyes and think about life. have fun :)

feeling lonely?

"For you are all children of the light and of the day; we don’t belong to darkness and night." 1 Thessalonians 5:5

Have you ever wondered why you feel so alone at night? You had a great day, surrounded by good friends...so why is it you feel lonely now in your room? It's because God has made us all children of the day. During the day, the sun's warmth touches our skin and we can actually FEEL it...it's almost a form of comfort when God cannot physically touch you.

At night however, it gets colder and since we've been getting our comfort the whole day with the warmth of the sun and being busy...there's a sense of emptiness, because the warmth is gone, you're done with work and there's no one around to hold you.

That is why God created this awesome hormone in our bodies called "Melatonin." Well, this hormone detects darkness and releases other hormones to make us sleepy, which is why we naturally sleep at night.

Notice at night we sometimes replace loneliness with artificial light or "warmth" with a TV, laptop/computer, video games, etc...we confuse our bodies and therefore we don't get the sleep we need--waking up late, missing out on being a child of the day.

This also applies with going out--especially in Las Vegas..I used to go out with my friends and come home around 5-6am! BAAAD idea. I was waking up at 4pm, exhausted feeling unfulfilled and only to exist during the cold of the night. Yes, we can go out and have fun...but what are your motives? Do you search for comfort only to hang out with other lonely people? Do you go out to find a temporary comfort such as alcohol/drugs/sex/gambling/pornography? Notice the desire for those things are at their highest at night...these comforts are lies and can truly hurt you, if not--already hurting you. A lion hunts its prey at night--when they are most vulnerable. Do not allow the devil to attack your mind during these times and fill your head with uncontrollable thoughts. You are a child of the Almighty God--He will always be there for you. Read his word/pray talk to him again, He will comfort, heal you, and set you free right where you are. Receive your freedom, be of the light.

2 Peter 2:20 says, "For you are a slave to whatever controls you."

Galations 1:10

Have you ever became less of a person just so others can like you? I'm guilty, I've been there. There were times where I'd honestly give up my righteousness for someone to like me. That's something I've been working on ever since I got saved.

I've learned how to respect myself more and show God that I'm changing for the better. I can't stand seeing myself pretend to be who I was in the past. "Going back" is not attractive once you've grown, nor is it comfortable.

An artist never goes back to when they sucked...they just progress.

Back then, I'd have no self-respect or control. I didn't receive God's love because I didn't love myself...I looked for that fulfillment with people. Their love was so temporary yet the consequences were painfully devastating. Pain such as gossip, lies, name-calling, let downs, and ultimately, my depression. If any MAN or WOMAN makes you feel like your forcing yourself to be different, they are NOT your friend. They don't care about your well being...they only care about their temporary entertainment and that's YOU.

Don't be someone's joke. You're a sacred vessel belonging to Christ your King, your creator. If anything, get his approval. Respect him by respecting yourself. I'm slowly learning to do that again...this time listening to God's counsel. I've made a fool of myself amongst friends for way too long. What's worse, I've shamed myself before God too. It's time to be what the Bible wants me to be, no longer what the world wants out of me.

Show God that you mean business...let go of whats holding you back from being ALL that God intends you to be..even if what's holding you back is you. Renew your thinking, love yourself without being selfish. Romans 12:2 says,

"Do not copy the behavior & customs of this world, but let God transform you into a NEW person by changing the way you think."

Grace.

Its interesting being a Christian living in Las Vegas aka "Sin City".

I've been constantly asking myself:

-"who am I?"
-"how do I act in certain situations?"
-"what is my ministry?"

So the night before I prayed a prayer with faith of a mustard seed. I honestly wasn't feeling special or on fire with the Spirit, however, I knew that God was listening and had a plan to restore me. I go the Champion Center of Las Vegas every Sunday and heard their Wednesday service was good too--but I was always to lazy to go...

I was desperately in need for grace & something told me to MAKE TIME this week. So, I finally went to Wednesday service. The trip going there was an interesting one. First of all, I was very late, second of all traffic and red lights were everywhere! Surprisingly enough, the drive didnt take long at all.

*Please do not get discouraged when you think/know you're late for church. Or if you haven't been in a long time. Like the words of Oleta Adams, "I dont care how you get here, just get here if you can." Honestly, still going even though you're late/haven't gone in a while is already winning half the battle over Satan's many lies that you don't deserve to go. No don't believe that, that's so wrong. Yes, it's great to be on time and be excellent, but you also cant afford to lose a great message set up by God himself, just for you.

Going back to my story, the message that night was about Grace. I even got to share my testimony about SF and a few people that attended that night were touched by the Lord's words that came flowing from my mouth to the mic..and the miracle of strangers turned family came from that experience.

I'm glad I went, but I'm also very glad that those people came too. Jesus knows everyone and their personal needs and most definitely uses us to build relationships with others so he can heal and restore his people's hearts, bodies, and minds. He's such an active God who's presence and counsel is very specific to each person. Wanna feel special? Go back to the Lord's guidance and recieve your blessings. Blessings created just for you. <3

Guess what?!

VICTORY IS HERE!!!

Just not the way I expected...

Here's a little update: The house I was going to live in, in San Francisco burned down (my family living there are all fine though), I quit dancing to focus on school, and the LAST class I needed to graduate didn't work out. Yet, through all this God has shown me the right path and I will be staying in Vegas and get my Degree in psychology. Of course I was excited to move to San Francisco and start a new chapter, but I understand this is for the glory of God and I'm still pushing forward. I understand I have the victory in Jesus and I trust him. :)

He knows what & who I need in my life. God is ALWAYS in control.

Job sums it up real nice in Job 2:10 "Should we accept only good things from the hand of God and never anything bad?"

"God will use your mess and turn it into your message." --Joel Osteen

Philippians 4:10-12

I don't know where to go.

Paul wrote, "I have learned the secret of being content."
I've been hearing this message a lot lately. Basically, I don't know whether I should move to San Francisco or stay here in Vegas.

I've asked people to pray for me and I know God is working me towards the right decision.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

I need to stop deleting all my posts.

all thats left is the prayer. So today, I've decided...no more deleting. Like a journal with nothing but ripped out pages--pointless.

anyway, things are getting much better.
June 27th is my going away potluck.

Funny, the people I thought wouldnt go were the first ones to respond . Its a good opportunity to deepen relationships with the people I'm not close to. Food is always a guaranteed way of bringing people together, so I'm highly looking forward to sharing laughs and bond with those willing.

[a thought]: a friend informed me saying they're unsure if they can make it due to a recent death of a friend. this situation got me thinking...

I see love is also spelled T-I-M-E. So invest your love in people by spending some time with them.

James 4:13-17

My Prayer:
Lord, I'm sorry.
I keep boasting about these plans that I've neglected your purpose for me. I've been excited for the wrong things and have lost focus on what's true and more exciting-Working for your Kingdom and your Glory. Forgive me Father God, I've acknowledged my sins and ask you to allow me to get back my focus on you and YOUR plans Lord, not mine. -Amen.

Lets begin.

I want to share my life with you. I want to show you the way God adds his personal touch of counseling, healing, style, and taste to my life. My life as a God-fearing woman is very recent and while I am growing, I want you to grow with me. so, lets begin... :)